Stop Saying This - Part Five (#41 - #50)

#41 - “Not yet”; “Not now” These are easier than “No.” and let you postpone your problem/solution/change. They provide the easiest way not to change. Change usually fails because it’s too late, not because it’s too early. A leader is decisive, moves ahead, and doesn’t postpone things so whenever possible substitute these with a straight yes or no.

#42 - "Hey, if there’s any way I can help you, let me know”; “My door is always open, see me when you need anything” These tend to be clichés that lack sincerity and are used simply as a way of ending a meeting. Instead, build a rapport and inquire about the specific challenges faced by that person. You should demonstrate that they are not alone with a particular problem by asking: “How can I help?” and then listening. Then ask: “tell me more” which can lead to you enquiring: “can you help me?” as you understand the person and build a bond.

#43 - “Let me know if you have any questions” This is one of the worst ways to leave a customer. Instead, ask open-ended questions like “What can I help you with?”; “How are you today?”; “What brings you here?”; “What are you looking for?”

#44 - “Talk to x”; “Speak to x” Instead, say “Talk with x” and “Speak with y.” Using “with” is inclusive and friendly whilst “to” is more formal, top-down, and intimidating.

#45 - “Honestly” Saying “honestly” could imply that your other statements are not honest. There is no need to say it.

#46 - “Just”; “It’s just an idea, but…”; “I just thought…” It detracts from your credibility and confidence and negates the importance of your message. It diminishes everything that comes after. If you have a suggestion, idea, or concern then state it with confidence, rather than diminish it (and yourself).

#47 - “Very”; “Absolutely”; “Totally” The word “very” is very useless and has been called one of the most useless words in the English language. It’s one of those penny words that writers throw in to magnify another word. The only problem is that it is so commonplace, bland and overused that it fails to do that. Instead, use more creative and descriptive intensifiers such as “incredibly” or “remarkably”. An even better option is to use a more expressive/stronger adjective. “very tasty” = “delicious”, “very clever” = “brilliant”. The best option is to eliminate the word completely.

#48 - “Literally” Almost always an unjustifiable overstatement. Similar to “very”, use more creative and expressive phraseology to make an argument stronger and eliminate the adverb “literally”.

#49 - “Really” Similar to “literally” and “very”, this is an unedifying crutch. Although intended to convey emphasis, it invariably fails. It doesn’t tell us anything important and is inadequate as a description or intensifier. Nothing is lost by cutting it from a sentence – in fact, simplicity and directness are gained.

#50 - “Can’t you just…”

This is normally used in response to someone else’s articulation of a problem, but as a phrase, it is demeaning and negative - suggesting that whatever brilliant idea you’re going to propose is both obvious and simple. Rephrase to a more positive: “We could try to…”